Sarah Robertson writes about her experience at the first circle of the new term on 6th September 2016.

And so, here I was, back at the church after a long summer away. I can’t tell you how lovely it felt to walk through the doors. Always a special place, I was immediately struck by the energy of the church. Had I just grown so accustomed to it that separation had now, once again, sharpened my senses to it? Like putting on a favourite perfume after a break? The energy definitely felt richer and deeper since I had last been there. There was a special energy in the air, the product of a happy summer that had seen the meditation circles continue over much of the holidays, the trace of the calm they left palpable. A joyous wedding had also taken place at the church, the first in many years. If the walls could talk… It felt like the building was rejoicing at this new surge of energy. Another precious aspect I noted was the real sense of camaraderie and friendship in the different circles. I had missed everybody. They had missed me. A genuine and sacred space had been built, worked on and honed throughout the summer. There were new faces and some were no longer there. It was fine, if it was not right for them, they would find what was. For me, coming back to the circle was like getting into a delicious warm bath.

I, too, had changed over the summer. I had spent periods of time in deep contemplation, pondering our true nature as spirit, undivided, the Godhead. Most of us encounter this when we die, but it seemed to contact spirit while alive was to cross the veil and reach out to this. Even if we had sought out a medium because of tragic events, for example the loss of a loved one, we were touching on the great mystery of ‘us’ and our source. It made me wonder when we communicate with spirit and perhaps even the spirits of loved ones, what were we communicating with? If we are all ‘one’ over there, then had our loved ones merged into white light? Did we somehow call them back into a separate self for the period of the communication? Did the whole contain traces of each personality that a family connection or intense bond could bring back? There was no time or space over there, or even a ‘before’ and ‘after’, which made it all the more intriguing. Once again it became so clear to me that to try and contact spirit with one’s mind or even understand it conceptually was not the way. We were to allow spirit to make an energetic connection through our energy body and then it would show us what was required. We were in the presence of the Divine and all we could do was receive. We were not the dreamer but the dream, something vaster and far grander was dreaming ‘us’. It was humbling to be reminded of this and made me feel all the more excited about the new term to come.

We were lucky enough to sit with Gordon Smith this week. I always enjoyed his teaching, his down-to-earth wit, his own humility and wisdom. He welcomed the new people, reminding us of the importance of service and healing. He also re-iterated the importance of the aura as the true vehicle with which the dimension of spirit could communicate with us. He mentioned how the Tibetans called it the light body. This seemed significant to me, but it would take events of the week to come for me to realise it. Again he reiterated the important part was the practise of just sitting with spirit. No matter if you were a beginner or already a working medium. This was the privilege and also the point of the circle. And as the lights went down, I sank quickly into the silence. Soon I could feel my energy body expand. As time went by, it dawned on me that it felt like my lower body had disappeared, yet I still I felt grounded. I sat there and just tried to fully experience it, to be totally present in it. I let go of my mind and allowed myself to experience this mysterious light body. And then, soon I felt it, something was ‘touching’ my aura. It was vast, expanded, far more intelligent than me, it was a presence, that is the only way I can put it into the words. It felt like I had called out to a great whale and it had swum by to take a look. I thought of Jonah in the bible. It was not going to divide down into a guide, or form that I could sense at this point, it was just hovering by and I was free of my physical form, just floating in the light of my own aura, gently meeting it. This was joy.

I could swim in this warm sea forever.